Pan Post 68 sees the creature dubbed "The Highmuckity One" on the planet Muq have his servant read a letter that had arrived. The letter is from Arkng Thand and informs The Highmuckity One that he has died and that he wishes for his obituary to include his service to The Highmuckity One.


Bad News For The Highmucky One

Nearby the center of the Milky Way galaxy, smack-dab in the middle of very significant space travel routes of at least seven galactic superpowers, there exists a planet that can be best described as "fat" behind its back. And on this planet, the High Muckity-Mucks loaf around in their self-importance. After all, when all these other galactic superpowers attempted to stake claim to the planet Muq at the same time, and the god-king of the Muckity-Mucks (the Highmuckity One) proclaimed its conquest over all that stepped in the Highmuckity Hegemony, the other superpowers just sort of rolled their eyes and went with it. Incidentally, the Highmuckity One, despite being a sentient sludge like the rest of its kind, often "parades" (flops) among Very Important Powers and "adventures" (farts) through interdimensional time and space. And such tales, long ago, involved one Master Arkng Thand, who at the time served as a scholarly advisor to the Highmuckity One's campaign against the Sponge Syndicate.

On this day, however, the Highmuckity One received a letter from Master Arkng Thand. Being a literal glob with no means to read such a letter on its own, and far too important to sully its...stubs... with reading the letter itself, the Highmuckity One had its servant -- a human delegate from Terra Flux -- read the letter for it.

The Highmuckity One: "Wahwahrumrahrum!"

servant: "Yes, your Excellency, the letter is, in fact, from a Master Arkng Thand. Shall I read it?"

The Highmuckity One: "fffffft."

servant: "Very good. The letter reads:

To The Highmuckity One,

If you are reading this letter, I regret to inform you that I, Arkng Thand, no longer live. As my final request to your Muckitiness, I humbly ask only that my obituary may include my service to your greatness.

Long live the Highmuckity One.

Arkng Thand'

...and that's all it says."

The Highmuckity One: "Rahwah?"

servant: "I believe the letter means to say that this Thand person has died, your Majesty. Shall I proclaim your rightful reign over all through this man's obituary, then?"

The Highmuckity One: "Fbllbllblblblaaaaaah!"

servent: "Very good, your Muckitiness."



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